Now and forever.

Im not ready to die. I DON'T wanna die. Just hurts a lot. I don't know, im not ready yet, im worried. terrified. AFRAID. Afraid. to lose them. Afraid that someday, my .. time would come.. the time where..I would calmly rest myself in peace. The time where i will be placed in a wooden coffin with a cold skin and a white blush. The time that they would be crying while throwing flowers. The time THAT I WOULD DIE. im not ready. IM NOT READY. not ready to the death of someone, someone I love. Why does everyone wants to talk about it, it scares me. I don't know if im ready to face the world without them, ALONE. DEATH scares me.

"You are my Life now." I'd noticed, I've been blogging for a year now. :) Early Morning something weird happened, Yeah , My dream's damn funny. Laugh then suddenly woke up, My mom staring at me like [OMGWTF face]. HAHA. :D damn crazy. Still feeling sad bout others thinking about death, I also thought about it, Thinking it would really hurt.. I DON'T WANNA DIE . "And so The Lion Fell In Love With The Lamb."

Faster Than a shooting star, Baby, YOU STOLE MY HEART. I NEVER WANT IT BACK.

"Even if the sky is falling down." Hey Guys, Miracle isn't it? Rhian Updating everyday? nah, still not sure, Just had the mood to type something in here. As Usual, I gone to bed late, Unexpectedly, I can't sleep, Inspite of the tiredness im feeling that time, I still keep thinking of something,- about the thing that guy told me. Geez Rhian, Why take it so damn seriously? Its just a mistake, right? But a part of me thinks i should be shocked, surprised. I don't know either what's the right thing to think. Another thing, what made me seriously angry is that my game's can't connect, server down, geez. I've been wasting money on a useless nincumpoop. I wish they'd give something FREE. haha. :) Just hours ago i talked to him, Kinda happy, after days not talking to him. I'd just miss him so much. haha. He's telling me how he is so excited about me having new phone, I also, felt the excitement. The fact that We'd always talk, That we'd

"Damn it Rhian," I said to myself. Maybe a rational thinking after heavy nights of playing and chatting. hella wiped out. Need some activities. Im hella sick. Socially. Guess so, After 1 week vacation from a far away placed and a nice place to go for swimming, I STILL CRAVE FOR MORE. Papa said he will buy me a new phone This coming school year, im so excited, excited that i would talk to him more often, that made me say , "Aww. sweet." . haha. Im weird, Right? and so Days Passed im doing what is right, keeping/avoiding others company, I know either, inside of me, He's doing he's part. I've got trust on him. Im having fun actually, talking with friends and like that, But no one ever seems to make me happy than he does. geez Rhian, damn it. Haha. [blush] , nah, joking. haha. :D Everyone starts to get weird, Talking about early death, goodbyes, Just hurts me. :( Please , do stay with us, with me? I don't know, And also, Everyone dreams about flying, hel